Make Love Like Time And Space Is Ending (It Is)

smoothope:

1. Tell him that, because JK Rowling created him, he is muggle-born.
2. Ask him whether his Dark Mark is a permanent tattoo or one of those stickers.
3. Sing the “Avada Kedavra song” every time he raises his wand
4. Ask him whether he bought you any souvenirs while he was abroad hunting for Gregorovitch.
5. Recommend Visine for his eyes.
6. Send him a valentine and write “Love from Bellatrix”.
7. Ask him if he likes LOLcats .
8. Ask him if he’s related to Nagini.
9. Whenever he wonders what he should make into his next Horcrux, sing “I LOVE TRASH” from Sesame Street, trying to sound like Steven Tyler.
10. Ask him which fan drawing of him he likes most.
11. Get him drunk and video-tape it.
12. Run up to him clutching at your hair and say, “OMG, I KILLED HARRY POTTER!”
13. Ask him if he’s been hit by the credit crunch and offer him to work at your office.
14. Take him to watch “The 40 year old virgin”.
15. After that, tell him that it’s about time he got a girlfriend and that Bellatrix would be more than willing to date.
16. Hum “like a virgin” whenever he’s around.
17. Tell him you understand and you won’t tell Rodolphus Lestrange about their affair.
18. Whenever he says sarcastically, “the boy who lived”, reply, “Oh, my lord, conquered by none…but a baby”.
19. Ask him if the reason he doesn’t date is because he’s gay.
20. When he looks outraged, say, “Hey, Dumbledore was gay!”
21. Then, proceed to inform him that Viktor Krum is still single.
22. Give him an official visit in a suit & tie and tell him you regret that his Horcruxes were accidentally and irretrievably recycled to be made into beer cans, women’s jewellery, cutlery and writing-paper, and that you will try to make up for the inconvenience by sending a free year’s supply of Heineken beer (saying, “It’s just about the best beer in the world, you know” in an advertising sort of voice). Also tell him he should be proud his Horcruxes helped save the environment.
23. Whenever he comes into a room, sing “The doom song” from Invader Zim.
24. Advise him on the best plastic surgery clinics.
25. Ask him how many times he got dumped.
26. Tell him he would fit for the role of one of Aro from Twilight.
27. Ask him if he sparkles in the sun.
28. Tell him that flying has long since become an outdated form of transport and tell him that driving lessons are very easy to do.
29. Make him get into a black Mercedes and hum the theme from “Mission Impossible.”
30. After Death Eater meetings, shout out, “Hey, what about the canapés and the cocktails?”
31. Tell him Tom Riddle sounds more Macho than Voldemort.
32. Tell him Dumbledore looks way more snazzy than he.
33. Ask him if he, the Dark Lord, is in fact Lord of the Dance Michael Flatly undercover and tell him to tap dance.
34. Ask him if he likes ginger hair and hum “Valerie” by Amy Winehouse.
35. Tell him to audition for X factor.
36. When he is owned by Simon Cowell, say, “why, he’s harsh, looks aren’t everything…”
37. Ask him if he’s so irritable because of indigestion.
38. Ask him to join the free hugs campaign.
39. Say “LAWL” every time he threatens to kill you.
40. Show him the sauciest drawings by Harry/Voldemort shippers.
41. …and every time he talks about Harry, sing “Harry & Voldy, sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G, first comes love, then comes marriage, then comes the baby in his little carriage.”
42. When he talks about ruling over the muggles, produce a huge amount of paperwork, and say, “what, did you think taking on the muggle world is that easy? The muggle world is ruled by bureaucracy which cannot be fought by anything, let alone spells.”
43. Make him watch Salad Fingers and say, “that’s you in a few years time.”
44. Whenever he doesn’t respond to death eaters pressing their dark marks, tell everyone, “It’s because he’s watching spongebob squarepants.”
45. Tell him, “Even muggles are more afraid of saying the word ‘wizard’ than ‘Voldemort’. You’re pathetic.”
46. Whenever he makes a mistake, stand up, put on a very clever, serious face, raise a finger, and say “Constant Vigilance”.
47. Tell him you’ll be there for him no matter what.  
48. Give him a detailed lecture on Newton’s laws of motion and tell him the reason he hasn’t killed Harry Potter yet is because he doesn’t know his physics.
49. Give him a pink, flowery floaty dress and tell him it’s in fashion.
50. Dress up like him on Halloween.
51. Wear extremely sexy clothes to Death Eater meetings and wink at him throughout.
52. Turn up at his place dressed like a doctor, with a grim expression and inform him that Harry Potter’s blood group is not the same as his and thus he shall soon die because he used it to come back.
53. Take him to a shrink.
54. Ask him which web browser he prefers: Firefox, Internet Explorer, Safari, Opera, or Google Chrome. When he looks confused, shout “HAHA, I HAVE KNOWLEDGE THAT YOU DO NOT! I HAVE POWERS THAT YOU DO NOT! I SHALL DEFEAT YOU WITH MY AWESOME INTERNET SKILLZ!”
55. Whenever he does something, shout, “HEY, YOU DIDN’T DO THAT IN THE BOOK!”
56. Sing “Voldy, Moldy, Pudding & Pie, kissed the girls and made them cry”.
57. Take him to “blind date”.
58. Ask him innocently whether he was abroad hunting Crumple-horned Snorkacks.
59. Give him a love potion for Christmas.
60. Write a valentine’s card to yourself and sign, “love Voldy”; then proceed to hug him, and wave the valentine in his face, thanking him, and singing “everybody loves somebody”.
61. proceed to send valentines with “love Voldy” on them to every death eater, male or female.
62. Tell him not to invade Russia since it brought Napoleon and Hitler down.
63. Tell him to blow his nose.
64. Buy him an eel, and say it’s much more practical to carry around than that huge Godzilla Nagini.
65. Slip him a mobile phone and set the ringtone to “A Cauldron full of hot, strong love” by Celestina Warbeck, and call him in the middle of a death eater meeting so that everyone hears it.
66. Keep hinting that you know something he doesn’t.
67. Start writing a book, “the life and love of Tommy M Riddle”, and when he threatens to kill you, say, “hey, it was Rita Skeeter’s idea initially anyway!”
68. Buy him books & magazines such as “20 fail-safe ways to charm witches”, “Playboy”, and  magazine clippings with advice on love life.
69. Buy him a night-light and a book of children’s stories, and explain it by saying “you look unhealthy, you must be loosing sleep…”
70. Whenever he muses, “so, how shall we bring the ministry down?”, shout out, “NINJA SKILLZ”.
71. Buy him a t-shirt featuring U-No-Poo.
72. Tell him that “Voldemort” sounds cheesy and say that “Tom Marvolo Riddle” could also translate to Doom Dave LOL-r-Tim which sounds much more modern and up to date with trends. If you have attempted #7 and survived, remind him of the LOLcats here.
73. Invest in a manual of Dumbledore quotes and read from it to him all day.
74. Tell him Harry Potter is cute. Say things like, “oh, his black hair is so sexy,” and “oh, did you see Equus?” and then say things like “I wonder if he knows I exist…”, and ALWAYS add, “ohh, don’t you think he’s gorgeous?”
75. Whenever he tries to kill you, tell him you’re his unintentional Horcrux, and add saucy things like, “ahh, I’ll be your horcrux, baby” and wink.
76. Tell him he should get hair extensions to get hot hair like Harry Potter in GOF.
77. Tell him Jack Sparrow is awesome and hum the “Pirates of the Caribbean” theme whenever he comes into a room.
78. Then proceed to tell him that Bellatrix is not completely ‘his’ since she had an affair with Edward Scissorhands and Henry VII, too, for that matter, both of whom were MUGGLES OMG!  
79. Ask him what the lowest price is for the awesome silver hand he gave Wormtail.
80. Give him a bottle of “tropical tanning lotion” for his birthday.
81. Ask him if he wants to play Russian Roulette
82. Persuade him to do so, and make sure he dies. MWAHAHAHAH.

~

Some of these are pure gold. Gotten from here.

roxiijonas:

glitterlove:

(via iyabbe)

1. A cell phone.
2. A hair straightener.
3. Your own computer.
4. Your own car.
5. Chanel/Dior/Gucci sunglasses.
6. A designer purse.
7. A boyfriend/girlfriend.
8. A curling iron.
9. Every Fall Out Boy CD.
10. Something from American Eagle.
11. Something from Hot Topic.
12. Something from Hollister.
13. Something from Abercrombie.
14. A pet.
15. Some type of trophy/award
16. Full/Queen-size bed.
17. King-size bed.
18. An iPod.
19. Something from a professional team.
20. Ever had more than $100 at a time.
21. Monster, Full Throttle, Amp, Red Bull, etc. in your fridge.
22. Something Green Day.
23. Xanga.
24. Myspace.
25. Makeup.
26. A desk in your room.
27. A hill in your backyard.
28. DDR.
29. A pair of skis.
30. An alarm clock.
31. A pair of ice skates.
32. Rollerblades.
33. A treadmill.
34. Your own phone line.
35. AIM.
36. Yahoo!
37. MSN.
38. ICQ.
39. AOL.
40. Perfume/cologne.
41. Bath lotion.
42. Necklaces and bracelets.
43. A journal/diary.
44. Yogurt and peaches in your fridge.
45. X’s in your screen name.
46. A birthday in September.
47. A famous relative.
48. A relative in a different state.
49. A disowned relative.
50. A relative that lives in Florida.
51. Your own bathroom.
52. Your own band.
53. Any rock band shirts.
54. A guitar.
55. A hammock.
56. A basketball hoop.
57. A soccer net.
58. A bike.
59. An electric scooter.
60. A minivan.
61. A V.C. Andrews book.
62. A friend that does drugs/alcohol/smokes.
63. A locker at school.
64. A baby.
65. Sparkly blue nail polish.
66. A “Vote for Pedro” shirt.
67. The movie “40 Year Old Virgin”.
68. A promise ring.
69. A pool table.
70. A swimming pool/hot tub.
71. Trampoline.
72. Livejournal.
73. Flip flops.
74. Steve Madden shoes.
75. The Sims 2.
76. A ping pong table.
77. An air hockey table.
78. A basement.
79. Converses.
80. Construction paper.
81. Markers, crayons, etc..
82. Coloring books.
83. A nice singing voice.
84. GameCube.
85. Xbox.
86. Playstation.
87. PS2.
88. PSP.
89. Some type of disease.
90. Rose Red movie.
91. VCR/DVD player.
92. A mom or dad.
93. An older brother.
94. An older sister.
95. A younger brother.
96. A younger sister.
97. A sled.
98. A lake/pond/river/ocean near your house.
99. Friends who like you.

littlenoirgirl:

claraexact:

Fill and reblog.

FIVE things you wish you could say to FIVE different people right now:

1. You are a horrible backstabbing bitch and I wish you a horrible life because that is exactly what you deserve.
2. You are my best friend (even though I’m rather annoyed with you at the moment) and I will always love you and be here for you :)
3. You are the greatest thing in my life, and I can’t imagine it without you and I hope that I never have to.
4. I’m starting to dream of the future, and it’s scaring me a little.

TEN things about yourself:

1. I worry too much
2. I love the horns I got at Ren Fest
3. I haven no idea what I would like to do with the rest of my life
4. I am happy
5. I think there could be something really wrong with me
6. I often care too little what other people think.
7. I’ve known real love
8. I want to move far far away
9. I want to travel to every country in the world
10. I love it when my boyfriend blushes :)

SEVEN ways to win your heart:

1. Make me laugh
2. Be good to my friends
3. Kind eyes
4. Be yourself
5. Speak your mind
6. Be a good friend to me
7. Like to read

SEVEN things that cross your mind a lot:

1. Boyfriend
2. Best Friend
3. Sleep
4. Puppy
5. I really need to get___ done
6. I’m bored
7. Bouncy!

FOUR things you do before you fall asleep:

1. Change/undress
2. Take my glasses off
3. Set my alarm
4. Say goodnight to the bf

FOUR things you see right now:

1. TV
2. Phone
3. Pictures
4. Stuffed Horse

THREE songs that you listen to often:

1. Brand New Day- Ryan Star
2. No One’s Gonna Love You- Band of Horses
3. Italian Radio- Blue October

TWO things you want to do before you die:

1. Own a horse
2. Make someone happy

ONE confession:

1. I’m scared of what this year will bring

playing-god:

jennytrinh:

Cross Out The Things You’ve Done.

Graduated High School.
Kissed someone.
Smoked cigarettes.
Got so drunk you passed out.
Rode every ride at an amusement park.
Collected something really stupid.
Gone to a rock concert.
Helped someone.
Gone fishing.
Watched four movies in one night.
Gone long periods of time with out sleep.
Lied to someone.
Been dumped.
Snorted cocaine.
Failed a class.
Dealt drugs.
Taken a college level course.
Been in a car accident.
Been in a tornado.
Watched someone die.
Been to a funeral.
Burned yourself.
Ran a marathon.
Your parents got divorced.
Cried yourself to sleep.
Spent over $200 in one day.
Flown on a plane.
Cheated on someone.
Been cheated on.
Written a 10 page letter. 
Gone skiing.
Been sailing.
Cut yourself.
Had a best friend.
Lost someone you loved.
Shoplifted something.
Been to jail.
Had detention.
Skipped school.
Got in trouble for something you didn’t do.
Stolen books from the library.
Gone to a different country.
Dropped out of school.
Been in a mental hospital.
Watched the “Harry Potter” movies.
Had an online diary.
Fired a gun.
Gambled in a casino.
Had a yard sale.
And a lemonade stand.
Actually made money at the lemonade stand.
Been in a school play.
Been fired from a job.
Taken a lie detector test.
Swam with dolphins.
Gone to sea world.
Attempted suicide.
Voted for American/Australian Idol.
Written poetry.
Read more than 20 books a year.
Gone to Europe.
Loved someone you couldn’t have.
Wondered about your sexuality.
Used a coloring book over age 12.
Had surgery.
Had stitches.
Taken a taxi.
Seen the Washington Monument.
Had more than 5 IM’s/online conversations going at once.
Overdosed.
Had a drug or alcohol problem.
Been in a fist fight.
Suffered any form of abuse.
Had a hamster.
Petted a wild animal.
Used a credit card.
Gone surfing in California.
Did “spirit day” at school.
Dyed your hair.
Got a tattoo.
Had something pierced.
Got straight A’s.
Been on the Honor Roll.
Known someone with HIV or AIDS.
Taken pictures with a webcam.
Started a fire.
Had a party while your parents weren’t home.
Gotten caught having a party while they were gone

01. You’re currently confused about someone’s feelings for you.
02. You have been in a serious relationship before.
03. You own an iPod of some sort.
04. You do not like your sibling’s girlfriend/boyfriend.
05. You drink too much alcohol. (Occasionally)
06. You have been to the Olive Garden.
07. You have taken medicine of some sort this week.
08. It is really cold in your house right now.
09. You are extremely dependent on others. (Some people)
10. You do not like to express your feelings in front of others.
11. You ate a lot of food today.
12. It doesn’t take much for you to cry.
13. People consider you a sappy sort of person.
14. Someone in your family is rich.
15. You have been to Disney World or Disneyland before.
16. You hate when people constantly talk about themselves.
17. You are a good listener, but you hate complainers.
18. Someone has called you for a serious medical emergency before.
19. You have had a surgery.
20. Your house has a spare bedroom.
21. Your house is old.
22. You have at least one cousin under the age of three.
23. You have never held a baby before.
24. You can’t handle toddlers.
25. You have a painting in your room.
26. You have been to Canada.
27. You have been to Mexico.
28. You love cherry flavored lollipops.
29. You celebrate Easter.
30. You observe Lent.
31. You are Catholic.
32. You do not believe in God.
33. Religion is not important to you. (A friend of mine phrases this perfectly: I’m spiritual, not religious).
34. You want to have a small family one day.
35. You would rather have more sons than daughters.
36. You have more aunts than uncles.
37. You hate being too cold.
38. You currently are way more tan than everyone else.

39. You wear shoes in your house.
40. Your parents are clean freaks.
41. You are more messy than clean.
42. You are currently angry at someone.
43. Patience is so not a virtue to you.
44. Your desk is extremely clean.
45. Your bed sheets are either blue, green, black, or white.
46. When you hear “black & white” it reminds you of Katy Perry’s ‘Hot n Cold’ song.
47. You have no clue what that song is.
48. You think rap artists are completely pathetic.
49. You are glad George Bush IS out of office.
50. Politics are boring to you.
51. You take a vitamin daily.
52. You feel like you are sick often.
53. You hate throwing up.
54. You think it’s gross when people set food down on their desk at school with no napkin.
55. You also find it gross that people sit on top of desks.
56. You are now cringing at the thought of someone’s food where someone’s ass was.
57. You love getting bubble baths.
58. You do not like chocolate at all.
59. You are allergic to nuts.
60. You have been stung by a bee before.
61. You have been to the emergency room before for something.
62. One of your parents is 50 or older.
63. You are the baby of your immediate family.
64. You hate broccoli.
65. Cooked carrots are good, though.
66. You go on tumblr too much.
67. You are really comfortable right now.
68. You like witty t-shirts.
69. You are a major fan of underground bands.
70. You have been on an airplane before.
71. You are not afraid of heights.
72. You consider yourself paranoid.
73. You have had a panic attack before.
74. The thought of being old and alone bothers you.
75. You would choose the elderly over children.
76. You feel like you’re living in the wrong decade.
77. You have smoked weed before.
78. You think its too cold outside right now.

79. You love the thought of sleeping in tomorrow morning.
80. You would rather go to bed early and get up early.
81. You feel like the early bird catches the worm.
82. You are a big breakfast eater.
83. You are currently suffering from the common cold.
84. You are craving something salty.
85. You have been in a car today.
86. There is something plugged in near you.
87. You have heard of the TV show “Private Practice.”
88. You do not like medical television shows.
89. You prefer horror to comedies.
90. You adore Leo & Kate.
91. You think high-waisted pants look good.
92. You hate cheesy movies.
93. You enjoy camping out.
94. Bugs don’t bother you.
95. You do well in school without trying.
96. You are extremely jealous of someone currently.
97. You feel like you have changed a lot from 08-09.
98. You like energy drinks.
99. You like italics.
100. You know the entire script of Mean Girls.